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Monday October 11, 2004: Violet, the Color of the Crown Chakra

  

Be sure you've read September 15: Intro to Mystic Experiences before continuing.... Excerpt from THE LAST HIGH PRIESTESS: SURVIVING MULTIDIMENSIONAL REALITIES 

       ......The third meditation, Sunday morning, was with yogis who had been practicing for many, many years.  This would be a quiet and intense sitting.  If there were messages that the deities had needed to relay to me, it had already been done.  I convinced myself I had seen all I needed to see.  This meditation could finally be silent and still for me.

         I relax into the stillness and peace.  I am overjoyed to have only stillness, only peace.  I float, happy and content.  When my mind finally begins to complain of the stillness, I begin focusing on  'Soham,' as V.G. had suggested.   'Soham' is a non-chanting chant, meaning 'That I am.'  After the breath becomes rhythmical and the mind becomes quiet, there is still an awareness of one's existence; then arises the question, "If I am not of this body, then who am I?"  'Soham' is an answer to that query, carried along with the breath, and pointing to the fact that 'I-am-that.'

         I am watching my breath pulled down through my lungs, feeling the essence of 'Soham.'  Krishna appears before me.

       "Go away.  Leave me alone."

       "Ahhh, is that any way to talk?"  He appears before me as a young adult.  "You are taking this too seriously."

        "Well," I reply, "I want to take things seriously.  Get lost."

         Krishna stays, taking my hands and smiling a mischievous grin.  I do not like this.  I do not trust Krishna.  Krishna seems to delight in catching me off guard, in embarrassing me.  Yet I am helpless to break the meditation.

         He grabs me and pulls me over onto a gigantic lotus flower that sits under a tree.  I recognize the tree.  What is this garbage I wonder -- some strange mixture of Hindu and Buddhist symbols?

        "Come play with me," he teases.

        "No," I shout at him.  "If you aren't going to teach me anything, then bug off."

         This makes him laugh.  He grabs me and twirls me around so we both collapse on the flower petals.  Krishna is on top of me, pinning me down.  This is why Krishna embarrasses me.  I think he does it just to see me flustered.

        "So," he says, staring deep into my eyes, "you want to see what I can teach you?"

        He lowers his head towards mine, still staring deep into my eyes, and I am afraid he is going to kiss me.  My body tightens up.  If he tries to kiss me I am going to push him off.  I can't tell if I am angry or frightened.

          I watch his face come closer and it suddenly dissolves into a soft violet color.  Everything around me softens into the color violet.  Ah, but how could the word 'color' describe what is before me?  All my tension dissolves as I am mesmerized by the beauty.   I have seen glimpses of violet before in meditation but this is different.  I float in beauty that is textured, glowing, alive.

          I would be content to stare at this for hours and hours.  It is beyond any color I have seen before.  It touches deep within me, stretching outward towards forever.  I feel a sense of awareness.  The color is awareness, and the awareness fills my being.  It is a soft sweetness-- not the sweetness of taste, but touch.  I stare for ten, perhaps fifteen minutes, aware of nothing but the beauty, the blissful sweetness of violet.  Then a thought forms in my mind.

         Violet is the color of the crown chakra.  I am working with the crown chakra.  The color vanishes.  And I kick myself.  Why did I have to analyze it?  The crown chakra is above mind awareness.  Why couldn't I just be content to be with it, to experi­ence violet for its own sake?

          I am frustrated with my lack of control.  There is a great empti­ness where the violet once was.  I desperately want it back.

         I reach out again, searching for the violet.  A blue appears, every bit as rich and breathtaking as the violet; yet blue comes from the chakra below violet.  I push it aside in frustration and am left sitting in the room while others still remain in meditation.  There was a time when I would have been happy with the blue.  Am I a spoiled child to throw it away?

         Coming out of meditation my body felt bubbly and tingling.   Perhaps it was a carry over from the violet.  It scared me.  What had Krishna done to my body?  The feeling faded, while I thought of what I would say if V.G. asked about my medita­tion.  To talk of Krishna as he appeared to me seemed disrespect­ful, sacrilegious by Christian standards.  Anxiety built.  No, I thought.  Krishna had a very different reputation within the Hindu culture.   The yogis here would not think ill of what Krishna had done.  But what would they say about the way I treated him?  Who in their right mind told any form of the Divine to get lost or bug out?

            I made up my mind to say nothing at all.  If V.G. asked about my meditation in front of the group, I would simply say it was good and leave it at that......

After the Fact:

         I forgot about the Buddhist elements to this dream until I'd begun having experiences with Tara, the female Buddha.  Several months went by after V.G.'s meditation before I decided to try another group meditation.  I chose a Buddhist group, in a desperate attempt to avoid Krishna.  I hoped that Buddhists were more direct in their meditations and thus, I would avoid encounters with any and all deities. Whether the Krishna experience predicted my Buddhist experiences, or signaled a subconscious push towards Buddhism, is subject to debate.

         The idea I find more interesting concerns the limitation of language in spiritual accounts.  Before this meditation, I had experienced states of higher awareness where I saw violet; felt expanded, uplifted, and altered within the deeper reaches of my being. Having read that violet was the color of the head charka, I felt sure that this was the level described and I had experienced the same awareness written about in books. I will never go back and say those earlier experiences were invalid or illusions, because there was a profound shift in awareness.  However, earlier visions of violet were not on the same level as the Krishna episode. The same words described markedly different realities.

           Whenever one has a mystical experience, it changes something inside you forever. What I want to get across is that one should not be too fast in assuming any one experience is the end of the road.  It does not matter if you have seen God, been touched by God, merged with the Universal/Absolute, or seen universal truths.  It does not matter if your experience sounds identical to what you read about in books, or what you hear from other people. That these insights are more profound than anything previously experienced does not rule out the fact that even higher/deeper realities may exist. 

         Our perception will always be limited by our current state of awareness and comprehension. If a mystical experience expands your awareness, then you are in a new position to begin exploring again.  As long as we retain a human body and live in the physical world, we are on a journey. Continue opening to new insights, and to the discovery of new wonders and miracles.    

 

Posted on Monday, October 11, 2004 at 05:10AM by Registered CommenterThe Skeptical Mystic | CommentsPost a Comment

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