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Sunday September 19, 2004: Warnings from Beyond

            One always runs into a problem with prophetic or clairvoyant warnings. You run the risk of never knowing: never knowing if your actions could change the future; never knowing if you should say something; never knowing if you were successful.

            I can tell you now -- precognition sucks when you're seeing your own death. My worst incident occurred during my teenage years. It was essential, as secretary for our church youth group, that I drive downtown one evening a month for Steering Committee meetings. No problem: I accepted the 40-45 minute drive, even when I started out one night in the midst of a snowstorm. I had a fifteen-minute drive on paved two lane country roads before hitting the expressway ramp that would take me downtown.

            About half way to the expressway I became increasingly upset. The thought occurred that, unless I turned the car around, something horrible was going to happen. Ridiculous, I thought. I needed to be at that meeting. As emotion continued to build in intensity, I tried reasoning out if I was actually foreseeing an accident, or simply worrying about the snowfall and possible slick roads I'd have to drive on after the meeting.

The closer I drove to my entrance ramp the more the feeling grew, until I was near panic; it was not safe to continue driving; I must turn back now or risk serious consequences. I gave in and headed back for home. The farther I drove away from the expressway, the safer I felt. By the time all panic feelings were gone, I felt simply foolish. Of course I had to be at that meeting and spooky feelings were not a valid excuse.

             I turned the car around and headed once again towards the expressway. The feelings quickly returned, building in intensity. I tried to reassure myself that if road conditions were becoming more treacherous with snow fall, then I just needed to slow down and be extra cautious. Negative feelings continued growing. I passed my earlier turn-around point. By this point, tears were streaming down my face and the panic of impending death pressed hard. I slowed the car, battling my own feelings before finally forcing myself to make the turn onto the freeway. Sometimes, I told myself, it's just an issue of getting past one's initial fear.

         Easing onto the freeway, I found the images growing even worse. Now, through the tears, I could clearly see myself laid out in a coffin. Whatever lay ahead of me on the freeway was something I would never survive. I made it only half a mile before taking the first exit. Again, as I put distance between me and the expressway, the panic eased.

         Being stubborn, I considered once more trying to make the meeting. Just the thought of turning the car around brought back enough panic that I finally gave up and went home. I'm not sure which upset me most: that I couldn't make it to the meeting and knew I could never give the real excuse, or the vision itself. But here's the problem....

            I will never know if I would have died had I continued on the expressway. That is one of the first major problems with prophetic visions. If you change your course there is no proof, no rational justification because you also change what would have happened. Unless you were looking at a group disaster and the plane crashed without you on board, you can never be absolutely sure if you responded to a future reality or some deep-seated inner fear. That's what you have to live with.

       I may feel comfortable that this particular choice was right and that it probably averted personal disaster, but I've had a number of other impressions of terrible consequences that were more wishful (or fearful) thinking. How do you differentiate the impressions? To be continued...........

Posted on Sunday, September 19, 2004 at 08:30AM by Registered CommenterThe Skeptical Mystic | CommentsPost a Comment

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